THE 4 GIRLS EVERY MAN DATES

THE-4-GIRLS-ALMOST-EVERY-GUY-DATES-PHOTO2

Just like how boys were categorized into meaningless categories, so were girls. For every Party Boy is a Party Girl. For every Alpha Male is a Domineering Bitch. For every Nice Guy is a sweet Girl-Next-Door. Yet, whatever your dating history, you will probably date these 4 girls in your life:

1. Youth – the right person you meet at the wrong time

She’s the one you wrote silly love notes to. She’s the girl who made you lose focus at school. Before you met her, school was just boys and balls. But after you met her, she became the reason why you even looked forward to school. She’s the one who made you conscious about your looks. She’s the one that you got nervous going out with, because when most saw you as just a kid, she saw you as her man. She’s the reason why you spent much of your time as a teenager in buses and trains.

She’s the one you liked enough to attempt all your firsts – your first date, your first attempt in holding a girl’s hand, your first kiss. But she is also the first you lose. Not because you didn’t love her but because growing up, you realize that in life, some stay and others go, and that sometimes we don’t just grow up, we also grow apart. Youth – she was your first girlfriend. She was your first heartbreak.

2. Love – the right person you meet at the right time

She’s the pretty girl who randomly caught your eye. She’s the stranger you wanted to find out more about. She’s the one you spend time befriending rather than rushing out for a date. Over time, you see that she’s the reason why things didn’t work out previously. All of a sudden, you realize the past heartbreaks were all worthwhile.

She’s the girl you don’t just send to the doorstep but enter home with hand-in-hand. She’s the girl who plays the Playstation with you at home. She’s the girl who’d rather cuddle with you in the comfy couch watching TV than heading out to the theatres for a movie. She’s the one you’re proud to be seen with in town when she’s all glamorously made up, in heels. But she’s also the one whose beauty goes beyond skin deep that you’re happy to cuddle her in bed, even when she’s bare faced and in baggy PJs.

She’s watched you grow from being the boy who spent hours in the bus/train to being a man behind the wheel. Unlike Youth, Love knows you inside out. Somehow, she understands that you too have your own life. She never gets into a fit when you have to spend time with the boys at the soccer pitch. Somehow, she always knows when you were having a bad day and need a hug. With Love, everything is effortless and natural.

She’s the girl you’re proud to bring home to your parents. She’s caring like your mother, irritating like your sister but loving like no other. You don’t fear the commitment because with Love, everything feels like it was meant to be. For the lucky boy, Love is not just the right girl, but also the one he marries and grows old with. For the average Joe, Love simply is the one that got away.

3. Pleasure – the random person you meet at any time

She’s the girl you met at a party/club/bar. She was your friend’s friend. What first started out as a cheeky moment transformed into something special. She’s the one your friends don’t know you’ve gotten really close to.

She’s the one you admire because she’s the rare girl who’s confident enough to be with you without a status. But little do you realize that maybe she’s the girl who likes you so much, she accepts the lack of status just to be with you. She’s the one who’s always there when you’re looking for some fun. She’s the one who looks you in the eye with a special twinkle in the eye, for only you both know what previously transpired.

You like her but you don’t love her. She’s fun but she’s not the one. They call her No Strings Attached. But you know, Pleasure, really is your dirty little secret.

4. Marriage – the wrong person you meet at the right time

She’s the one you imagine doing your dishes, the one you imagine making your bed every morning. She’s the one whose looks are pleasant enough to have your kids. She is the mini version of your mom, less the nagging and the wrinkles. Ok, just kidding.

Marriage – she’s the confident independent one. She earns her own keep and leads her own life. She’s the one who wakes up strutting down the business district in heels. She isn’t as cute or innocent like Youth. She isn’t as sweet or endearing as Love. Neither is she naughty like Pleasure. You probably didn’t even think you’d fall for a girl like Marriage. But this moment happens to most men, especially working men. You wake up one day and realize that all of a sudden, you’ve lost interest in fun and short-lived pursuits. You’re tired of the chase. You’re tired of hellos that only end up goodbyes. You’re tired of girls trying to squeeze their materialistic buys off you. You realize that at the end of the day, all you really want is someone to be genuinely there for you. Not someone to get frisky with in bed but someone to cuddle to sleep.

By the time you meet Marriage, you recognize meaningful relationships are built on trust, not lust. You look at your beer belly and finally accept the fact that everyone (including you) isn’t always going to be young and fit. You figure out that life isn’t about slogging like a bitch at work, only to down beer at the bar night after night.

Marriage is ultimately the one you spend the rest of your life with, not because she’s hot, not because she’s fun but because she’s what you need. She’s the face you won’t grow sick of over time. She’s the independent woman who engages you intellectually, not just physically. She’s the woman who understands what it means to have had a hard day at work. More importantly, she’s unlike Youth, Love and Pleasure who needed to be pampered all the damn time. She understands that love is more than just roses but that love is about being there for each other. Most importantly, she’s the partner who’s capable enough for you to build your dreams with. Whether it’s raising your kids or maintaining your future home, you know she’s up to it.

For some, Youth, Love, Pleasure and Marriage are one and the same girl. For others, Youth, Love, Pleasure and Marriage may be 4 different girls.

Yet, regardless of whether it’s Youth, Love, Pleasure or Marriage who’s in your life, one thing stays true. That is, respect your girl. Never take her for granted or give her shit, for Erick. S. Gray says, “Whatever you give a woman, she will only make greater. Give her your sperm, she’ll give you a baby. Give her a house, she’ll give you a home. Give her groceries, she’ll give you a meal. Give her a smile, she’ll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit!”
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Click here to find out about THE 3 MEN EVERY GIRL DATES.

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Founder and Editor of Jcheongwrites, she writes about love and life.

74 Comments

  • Reply March 6, 2014

    Anonymous

    Great stuff man 🙂 Keep it up!!

  • Reply March 7, 2014

    Anonymous

    Love the last part quotes.. lol. Great writings there, good job well done ^ ^

  • Reply March 7, 2014

    Pei Juan Yew

    love the last paragraph “She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her”.

  • Reply March 7, 2014

    jcheongwrites

    Thanks stranger for your kind words! I hope you like my other posts as well! Keep reading 😉

  • Reply March 8, 2014

    Anonymous

    Really love this article:)

    Keep up the great job!

  • Reply March 8, 2014

    Anonymous

    I like both versions you wrote. However I prefer this more, maybe because I am a guy. Happy writing!

    Cheers~

    • Reply March 12, 2014

      jcheongwrites

      Hello! Oh it’s really nice to know you prefer the guy’s article as a guy. Stay tuned yup! Hope to see you around here 😉

  • Reply March 8, 2014

    Huishi

    Insightful, refreshing read. Keep it up!

    • Reply March 12, 2014

      jcheongwrites

      Thanks Huishi! I hope to see you around here 😉 Will be posting another post soon, so stay tuned!

  • Reply March 8, 2014

    Anonymous

    Very inspiring.. very true.. applicable and leggit. Thank you for sharing your point of view. 🙂

    • Reply March 12, 2014

      jcheongwrites

      Glad to know you like my article 😉 Stay tuned cause I’ll be posting more in future!

  • Reply March 9, 2014

    Anonymous

    I LOVE IT! Thank you for this writing. ;D

    • Reply March 12, 2014

      jcheongwrites

      aww thanks for your very endearing words! I will keep writing 😉 See you around here!

  • Reply March 9, 2014

    Anonymous

    In between the marriage and the pleasure, there’s the one that got away

  • Reply March 10, 2014

    abcdefg.hi

    I love the part about marriage! Thanks for inspiring me!

    • Reply March 12, 2014

      jcheongwrites

      Thanks for your kind words ABCDEFG.HI 😉 Cute nick you’ve got there. I’ll be posting more articles and hopefully they’ll be just as inspiring 😉

  • Reply March 10, 2014

    Sophie C

    Hi, I read both your girl and boy posts and saw some discouraging comments. You are just offering your personal opinions and I totally respect that so I don’t understand why people are refuting your opinions. By the way, beautifully, cleverly and wickedly written. Would be looking forward to your posts! Hugs!

    • Reply March 11, 2014

      jcheongwrites

      Thanks Sophie, your kind words mean a lot to me 😉 I hope to post my next article soon hehe

  • Reply March 11, 2014

    Anonymous

    nice article. keep it up man

  • Reply March 11, 2014

    Anonymous

    Love what you wrote! Looking forward for you next posts! 🙂

    • Reply March 12, 2014

      jcheongwrites

      Thanks stranger, I should be publishing my next post really soon, so stay tuned 🙂

  • Reply March 12, 2014

    eakky

    I totally relate to your post. You have a gift with words and what you write speaks to the heart. I’m gonna bookmark your blog. I look forward to reading more of your posts 🙂

    • Reply March 12, 2014

      jcheongwrites

      thanks Eakky! You’re so encouraging 😉 I’m gonna post more in future, so stay tuned yup! You can also follow me on facebook if you wish. This way, you won’t miss out on any posts! Hope to see you around!

  • Reply March 12, 2014

    eakky

    I was just commenting to my childhood buddy that I have not read a good blog in quite a number of years. Yup! I just left a comment on your FB page. I used to be an entrepreneur and also passionate about stories as I was a lifestyle magazine publisher when I was in my late 20s. Then the waves came crashing and I thank God for His life raft which gave me a new lease of life in my current industry. So your writing really stirred a bit of something in me. I’ll definitely drop by ever so often!

  • Reply March 16, 2014

    Stephanie Yan

    I like how you described 3rd type of girls you mentioned in this article, as a ‘No Strings Attached’ . It affirms me that for example, although a guy flirts me, I might not be the one he loves….very realistic… well said!

  • Reply March 18, 2014

    Vania Valentina

    Very inspiring! Thank you for writing this.

  • Reply March 21, 2014

    Grace

    This sounds sad and depressing. I’ve never had a boy who crushed on me and received silly love letters from. I don’t want to marry the wrong person. I just want to meet that guy who will love and cherish me for who I am. Through all my crazy and blunders. I refuse to fit into this narrow fit of “4 girls/ guys a man/woman would meet in their lifetime”. I just don’t.

    • Reply March 24, 2014

      Nad

      amen to that!

  • Reply March 21, 2014

    Abdulious

    Love it… well written and very sensible

  • Reply March 22, 2014

    Anonymous

    Wow! This is something that I can relate to. Thumbs up! You’re a good writer. Keep it up! 🙂

  • Reply March 23, 2014

    Anonymous

    Such delicate words used… love your last paragraph! It’s so meaningful and true! Keep up the good work

  • Reply March 23, 2014

    Veronica

    In a way.. this is true… keep it up man. I like the marriage part. Looking forward your next inspiring post!

  • Reply March 27, 2014

    Nicholas

    I enjoyed your style of writing! This piece certainly made me think! Thank you so much 🙂 Keep on writing!

    • Reply March 28, 2014

      J Cheong

      Thanks Nic, I will 🙂

    • Reply March 28, 2014

      Gee Yang

      Sure thing 🙂 love all your posts! ♡

  • Reply March 27, 2014

    Gee Yang

    This was amazing to read. I loved how you seperated the different girls, and how you organized everything! ♡ -made me blush so much when I read it and I don’t even know why! *absolutely one of the best articles I’ve read!

    • Reply March 28, 2014

      J Cheong

      Thanks Gee Yang for your kind words. Hope to see you around here in future!

  • Reply March 28, 2014

    Anonymous

    I’m sad that women still see themselves as having to do all the work in a relationship to please men. I hope that most women are more empowered than what is described in this article. I don’t need to be the one that a man “imagines doing his dishes.” Why would anyone want the role of mother to an adult man. It’s demeaning and shortsighted. Women are people and people are worth more. Eventually most relationships grow apart, so spend your youth in an equitable relationship with a man who doesn’t treat you like his mom. That’s my advice. This isn’t the best picture that was painted for married women. It’s sad.

    • Reply April 7, 2014

      Anonymous

      Like your comment

    • Reply July 12, 2014

      Carla

      You have a point but i think when we view it as what you’ve said you’re taking it literally.
      I believe what she’s trying to say is that when it comes to marriage that woman is mature enough to be left at home and knows how to do household chores.

  • Reply March 29, 2014

    I am me not you

    Great posts

  • Reply March 29, 2014

    I am me

    Someone said this to me. Upon meeting someone new, talking from our perspectives as guys, the first few months is because of the hormones. After that when senses kicks in. That’s when u decide where the relationship will be heading. Just saying if u feel the same. Just sharing. Great posts anyway. Been reading a few. Keep up the awesomeness!

  • Reply March 30, 2014

    aLiLuya

    You write too well.

    • Reply March 30, 2014

      J Cheong

      You’re too kind Aliluya but thanks for the kind words. Messages from readers like you touch me deeply!

  • Reply March 30, 2014

    Anonymous

    So which one are you?

  • Reply April 1, 2014

    Anonymous

    Really…i haven’t dated a single one

  • Reply April 4, 2014

    Anonymous

    Well done. That’s outstanding. So true

  • Reply April 5, 2014

    Robert MD

    You really got to the point. Those are the girls. Good note girl, keep up the good work.

    • Reply June 13, 2014

      J Cheong

      Thanks Robert!

      • Reply July 12, 2014

        Anonymous

        love this article!

  • Reply May 5, 2014

    worth

    i just love the layout of your website what or who is the designer or is it a theme that i can get? thanks for sharing.

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  • Reply May 13, 2014

    Francis

    J, your blog ought to be one of the best on Life related topic these days. Have fwded this to a few friends and we can all totally relate to it. Love your word choices. Keep it up and would def come by for more!

  • Reply June 12, 2014

    Tung Le

    Adorable writing!
    Your article inspired a young comic artist in our country (Viet Nam), she translated this story into Vietnamese and produced an animated version of it. Check it out if you are interested. https://www.facebook.com/Wazzapink.ip/media_set?set=a.4253037060336.100001177479586&type=3

  • Reply June 14, 2014

    Anonymous

    This is awesome! Thank you for sharing

  • Reply June 14, 2014

    Manuel

    This is awesome!

    • Reply July 12, 2014

      Faith

      Teary eyed ;'(

  • Reply July 11, 2014

    Haven

    Very well written. I like reading your blogs, I’m not into reading books, stories or blogs but I really like it. It catches me. It’s like the one that I’m looking for to lighten up my mind. Thanks J for writing this good. Hope to read more of your works.

    Cheers!

  • Reply July 11, 2014

    Carla

    i almost cried while reading this article. good job! 🙂

  • Reply July 12, 2014

    Carla

    this is one of the nicest blogs i have ever read. 🙂

  • Reply July 14, 2014

    kebabin

    this article is so fantastic, im just smiling while reading a lot of your writings. 🙂 its almost a true to life story. keep up the good work. 🙂

  • Reply July 16, 2014

    ivy

    Pleasure made me think of myself and cry..

  • Reply July 17, 2014

    Anonymous

    wow. great.

  • Reply July 19, 2014

    Richard

    Hi J Cheong, I rarely comment on articles, but you really hit the nail on the head. I just want to take this opportunity to thank you for writing this wonderful article. 🙂

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  • Reply January 27, 2016

    johny

    Very inspiring.. very true.. applicable and leggit.

  • Reply November 15, 2016

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